5 Motorcycles You Would Not Want To Take On Long Distance Rides

To say a machine isn't great for something is like a red rag to its faithful fans, and the next thing you know, someone is off to Patagonia on an electric unicycle, a million followers cheering/egging them on. So it is my hope that the following list of motorcycles that are not great for long-distance rides sets off at least a couple of wild adventures to the ends of the earth, just to prove a point. Tag us here at SlashGear when you roll out.

We could see it happening because the following bikes, although not designed to join the Iron Butt Rally, are extremely capable and loved in the niche they were built for. That does not mean that, from time to time, these specialists aren't asked to do more than they were designed for, or that you can't have a ton of fun using a bike in ways it was never intended.

But if you take any of these motorcycles for a truly long ride, you are going to have your work cut out for you. The following five bikes certainly have their charms and fan bases, but they were not built for long-distance touring.

Even before I did any research, I can feel that some mad rider has probably followed in Magellan's footsteps and circled the world a few times on Honda's tough little Grom, but even the most hardcore Grom riders would have to admit they are not built for long-distance rides. Its small size is among its most beloved features, but that does not endear it to the all-day rider.

Instead, it was made to be the ultimate neighborhood runner, short-range commuter, perfect for low-speed weaving through traffic and wedging into spots nothing else can park in. Its diminutive 124cc motor is surprisingly willing when put to the task it was built for, namely fuel-efficient commuting. Its air-cooled engine can return over 100 mpg and an even higher number of smiles per mile. Prepare to receive a lot of thumbs-up and jealous frowns from car drivers, as you slide through urban traffic snarls.

It is when you push the Grom into unfamiliar territory that you start to plumb the depths of its inappropriateness for long days on the highway. Its small size makes wind buffeting ever-present. Its small, single cylinder is positively wound out to reach the mid-60 mph mark. The rider geometry, perfect for zipping around the city, quickly imparts fatigue on longer rides. The highway road trip on a Grom would pass in a flickering series of moments of terror interspersed with taxing fatigue.

The Yamaha TW200 is the ultimate farm bike, and has been for longer than many very experienced riders have been alive. Yamaha first rolled out this little trooper of a bike in 1987, and it has changed very little over the years. A move to fuel injection a few years ago, and minor cosmetic updates are about it.

And therein lies the TW200's charm. It is truly dialed in and perfectly designed to do what it does best, namely, leisurely patrols down back roads, scrambles around dirt paths, and bounces over fields where its fat tires and light weight combine to give it a manageable, floating ride that can take it places that would shock the uninitiated.

Owners treat these cool little single-cylinder T-Dubs like faithful friends. The beloved Yamaha may be the next best thing to having a pet pony by your side, but like a pony, it does not belong on the interstate. Its air-cooled 196cc motor is a true legend, with anvil-like reliability and great fuel economy, as well as low-speed gearing that makes low-speed riding easier, but all of that cuts down its ability to be an all-day distance machine. 

The TW200 excels at motoring around dirt roads and over fields where its large tires and light weight make it a charmer in its bailiwick. However, it is punishing once you push it to high speed on the open road. But like a faithful pony, it will do its best to please you.

When you hear the phrase "limited production, track-focused, specialist superbike," the first thing that leaps to your mind is probably not "road trip!" That makes a lot of sense, as this Italian thoroughbred is a track monster designed from day one to lay down blistering lap times, not run you down to the beach. The Panigale V4 R is a time trial weapon, and, with a price tag north of fifty, it is not a very cost-effective way to get around the country either. A small price to pay for over 200 horses and Italian motorsports engineering, but all of that engineering is designed to get a rider around a track, not a tourist to their next potty break.

The Panigale V4 R is equipped with components that put the rider in an extremely aggressive and athletic stance. Clip-on handlebars force riders into an aerodynamic stoop. Good for race-day speed, but it places a ton of pressure on the wrists, elbows, upper body, and neck of riders. The V4 R's foot pegs sit at the customary high height of race bikes, putting tension on the hip, knee, and ankle joints.

All of this gives riders a commanding physical connection to the motorcycle. However, this stance limits the amount of time even well-trained athletes can spend in the Duck's saddle before the complaints of the rider's body — which was not designed by Italian engineers for race day — bring the fun to an end.

The KTM 300XC-W, the Austrian maker's enduro king, is a 300cc tool designed to do one thing: dominate enduros with low-speed grunt, snappy handling, and high-clearance suspension. If your idea of fun is a stopwatch and a dirt circuit, you probably don't have to be told the virtues of the 300XC-W, for they are famous in their niche. However, don't plan on running up to the mountains for a camping trip, though, because that is just not going to happen.

Instead, plan on mixing up some oil and gas, feeding the KTM's two-stroke heart, and making use of its seemingly instant low-end grunt and knobby tires to scramble up boulders and hop over logs on forest service trails. The wide-ratio gearing that makes this bike unsuitable for highway cruising comes into its own on the dirt. Its twitchy nature is exactly what you want when accelerating up a rocky hill trail from a standing start, but it would be a handful on the open road.

It wants to take you into its world of flying mud and gravity-defying jumps, with its knobby tires biting into mud rather than skittering uncertainly through corners. Its wieldy size and weight make it one you can throw in the back of a pickup or on a small trailer and take it somewhere where it can do what it does best: namely, flinging its rider effortlessly through the gnarliest dirt tracks out there.

Sorry to dash the dream of those who love the Boss Hoss line of massive cruisers for their roaring V8 power and fat automotive tires, but despite having more car parts thrown on it than your average Chevy truck, this cruiser is still no car, and on a long road trip it would wear you down to a nub. Riders who opt for the Boss Hoss Cruiser, as opposed to its Bagger model, are advised to stick around town.

Powered by a 350ci or larger Chevrolet V8, Boss Hoss bikes can be customized with a variety of engine options, including carbureted or fuel-injected setups. This company is very much a part of Chevy V8 and small-block hot rod culture, and the engines can be optioned with both performance and cosmetic upgrades. Although the Boss Hoss Baggers can make a claim to be set up for road tripping, riders who elect to go for the Cruiser are advised to stick to the street and strip rather than the highway.

In cruiser format, the rider is exposed to wind and weather, with little protection from the elements. The Boss Hoss Cruiser is a big, heavy bike that can tip the scales at over half a ton and requires a lot of strength-sapping muscle work to push around. Its weight certainly would not stop an owner from hopping around from spot to spot on bike night with his beloved monster, but over the course of a long trip would take a toll.