Every Super Bowl 2023 Tech Ad Shown During The Big Game
Super Bowl Sunday is the biggest event on many sports fans' calendars, with over 100 million people tuning in to watch the Big Game. Advertisers also love it and spend a small fortune securing a spot. Many then spend an even larger fortune acquiring top-level talent and cramming a Hollywood-level production into a 30-second ad. These ads have developed their own cult following, with some viewers totally uninterested in the sport and only tuning in to see their favorite actor dangle out of a helicopter while chirping on about Chevrolets. Ads in previous years have featured Hollywood A-listers, outlandish stunts, and strange plotlines — and this year is no different.
Several major tech companies have made promos in an attempt to generate hype for their brands. The list includes Uber, Google, Paramount+, Squarespace, and more. A number of major stars have been recruited to star in the ads, including Adam Driver of Star Wars fame, musician Doja Cat, and rap icon P. Diddy. So what can you expect? While there may be some surprises on the day itself, news and previews of the ads are usually released before Super Bowl Sunday, so we do know what we're looking at for the most part. If you don't want to wait until February 12, we've rounded up all of the tech-based ads that have been confirmed. Or if you're reading this on or after February 12, it's time to re-live the magic — or the pain.
Paramount+ puts Sylvester Stallone on a mountain
Streaming services have taken a prolific beating over the last few months. Netflix's stock is in the toilet, Disney is undergoing a massive restructure aimed at getting its streaming services back into the black, and Paramount+ is hoping to boost its prospects with a star-studded Super Bowl ad. Headlining its commercial is someone who's used to taking a beating on camera, Sylvester Stallone. Stallone looks rockier than ever in the ad, as his face has been digitally chiseled into the side of a mountain, Rushmore style. Other characters, including Bevis, Butthead, a couple of "Star Trek" characters (animated and otherwise), and "Reno 911's" Jim Dangle look on.
Dangle and Co. watch Stallone reference another one of his famous roles as he dangles "Cliffhanger" style from his Mount Rushmore-style monument's nose. Dora the Explorer opens the narration as several characters express concern for Stallone's well-being. The carving of the action star's face, which is animated, eventually sneezes and sends him plummeting into the snow below. Stallone's three daughters assure everyone he'll be fine and he "does this all the time," and then the ad ends.
Uber goes all musical with P. Diddy, Kelis, Donna Lewis, and Montell Jordan
Uber, which is one of the few car-related companies confirmed to be pumping out car-related Super Bowl ads this year, has gone all musical with its offering. P. Diddy stars in both of the efforts the company has released so far, with Uber's representative requesting a "hit" from the rap icon to help them promote the company's new "Uber One" service. Both Diddy, and his representatives, are adamant he "don't do jingles." He does agree to provide a "hit" though and apparently is quite "excited" by the whole venture.
This second ad stars more iconic musicians than P. Diddy has had name changes. Diddy himself takes the role of producer, or something similar, during the ad. Montell Jordan kicks things off in the studio with an "Uber" version of "This is How We Do It," before Welsh songstress Donna Lewis takes the musical baton.
Kelis, who is most famous for a song about milkshakes luring boys to particular yards, rehashes her hit next before the audience is cruelly reminded that "What Does The Fox Say" is actually a song that was released and ended up everywhere a few years back. Diddy thankfully makes the fox-costumed singers pipe down. Haddaway finally turns up and rounds everything off with a modified version of his hit "What is Love," and the whole thing ends with Uber's executives looking a bit unimpressed.
T-Mobile makes everyone feel old with Zach Braff and Donald Faison
T-Mobile is using the Super Bowl as an opportunity to showcase its 5G home internet service. It's set to a modified version of the most famous song from one of the most famous musicals of all time and stars John Travolta alongside two of the main characters from the well-loved doctor-based sitcom Scrubs. It's been about 45 years since "Grease" was released, so the nostalgia wave caused by Travolta singing "tell me more" may be replaced by a realization that if you saw "Grease" during its original cinema run, you're probably not far off drawing a pension at this point.
Millennials also get to experience the joys of realizing they aren't quite as young as they once were when Zach Braff and Donald Faison, who played JD and Turk in "Scrubs," show up looking decidedly middle-aged. That series first came out in 2001, which is 22 years ago. If you were born when "Scrubs'" first series hit the air, living in a city is probably fun. If you remember anyone from this ad during their respective heydays, you'll probably be more comfortable shifting to the suburbs where this ad is set. The three main characters are dancing around a cul-de-sac and singing away about what a great deal T-Mobile's broadband is, while it's being installed in the background. There's no real reason for this group of actors to be in an ad together, beyond letting boomers and millennials know the fun times are over and it's time to buy a three-bedroomed house in the sticks and shop around for broadband deals.
Google Pixel fixes mistakes with Amy Schumer, Giannis Antetokounmpo, and Doja Cat
A good portion of last year's Google Pixel event was focused on the Pixel 7's ability to edit, fix, and improve photos. Google seems to have carried its #FixedonPixel enthusiasm over into its Super Bowl ad this year. The ad opens by showcasing how you can use the software included with the Pixel to easily remove awkward photobombs, long-departed exes, and other unwanted parts from older photographs. It then cuts to Amy Schumer, who seems quite happy with the ability to remove her exes from her photo roll, and possibly reality if Giannis Antetokounmpo's contribution is to be taken seriously in any way.
The software is also shown removing a slogan from a t-shirt, and removing a dog from a cat's selfie. Then Doja Cat shows up to snap a horrifically blurry photo with some fans. Luckily, Google's camera software can fix this too along with a bunch of other problems. You can even fix a photo of someone playing Football decades before the Super Bowl was even a thing.
Squarespace clones Darth Vader's emo grandson Adam Driver
Instead of being deleted like Amy Schumer's fictional ex-boyfriends, Adam Driver is instead copied many thousands of times by Squarespace. In the ad, Driver is sitting in an office when he discovers Squarespace is a website people use to make other websites before taking the whole concept a bit far. Cut to Driver wandering through the desert hypothesizing that Squarespace could technically create itself. He repeats the words Squarespace is a website that creates websites as more Adam Drivers step out from behind him. A massive wormhole or something then opens up and sucks all of the Adam Drivers into it. Aside from the original, who escapes unscathed if you ignore the ruined suit? He then says "you did it Adam Driver" as some sunglasses whip past his head.
The ad is entitled "The Singularity" which is a reference to the idea that technology will one day advance to the point where an AI can create technology on its own and the whole thing spirals beyond humanity's control. It can also be used to refer to the part of a black hole where time and space begin to break down due to immense gravity. Squarespace has somehow managed to cram both meanings into a minute of advertising space.
While the basic point of the ad is easily graspable and repeating "Squarespace is a website that makes websites" will undoubtedly embed the concept of Squarespace in your brain forever, the whole thing is incredibly odd. It ends up like some sort of weird mashup of "Inception," "The Matrix," and that weird perfume ad where Johnny Depp is playing guitar in the desert for no apparent reason.