Here's a personal question to start the weekend with: do you have a dirty bottom? Well, do you? And, ostensibly unconnected but stick with me here, have you ever wanted a tiny water-jet to pop out from under your toilet seat and douche you in the downbelows? From the sound of it, TDavid is giving it some serious thought.
In a world where toilet-tissue is passé you need to be able to pull a discrete lever and spray yourself until you're fresh. But a normal bidet takes up space in your bathroom and demands plumbing skills, so the Biffy clip-on bum-spritzer is a $99 way to achieve the same cleanliness of tush.
A self-cleaning nozzle means you needn't worry about accidentally showering yourself with something unsavoury, and as Biffy themselves assure you, "because you don't have to touch your bottom parts, you don't have to worry about accidentally contaminating your hands or your clothes." God bless you, Biffy!