Blasted with the undeniable power of sound. You've seen Back to the Future, yes? Do you recall the beginning of that 1985 classic, the part where Marty plays a single chord on the amplifier taller than he was? Remember how he was shot directly to the other side of the room? That's what's going on here, going on with alarm clocks. The company known as Sonic Alert presents three alarm clocks capable of punishing your eardrums with 113 decibels of sound - that's enough to wake you up from just about any amount of knocked out.
Take your pick from Sonic Bomb™, The Skull™, or of course, Sweetheart™. All three do basically the same thing, that being blasting you with more noise than anyone could possibly sleep through, plus they come with a bed shaker. Called Super Shaker™ for two of the alarms and Bone Crusher™ for the other (guess which one), there is no way in the world you'd ever have trouble waking up in the morning ever again. Why? Not necessarily because you're getting shaken up with a vibrating bed and ripped apart by sound, but because you've experienced that terror and never want to go through it again. It's a real brain game.
Each of these clocks is available for purchase at Sonic Alert's surprisingly blandly designed site. Also I should mention that if you've survived the morning wakeup, you can use the alarm as regular music player amplifier for some Enya to calm back down your nerves.