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Author Archive for Philip Berne

I Cheat at Foursquare

, Mar 25th 2012 Discuss [13]

My name is Philip Berne, and I cheat at Foursquare. I’m unrepentant and I have no remorse for my behavior. I will not stop, even now that my secret is out. What are you going to do about it?

I check into places I have not been. Sometimes, those places are far away from where I’m sitting. Before I ever visited Good 2 Go Taco, I checked in there on Foursquare. I was more than 10 miles away at the time. I did it to needle my boss, who was mayor of the joint at the time. I was threatening to steal all of his mayorships from him, and I knew that Good 2 Go was his most prized mayoral possession.

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Sqoot and Skedaddle

, Mar 23rd 2012 Discuss [6]

If there is a rule to being offensive, it’s this: you can say whatever you like, as long as it’s funny. That’s true on stage, on the Web, and in person. I’ve been friends with some truly offensive people. They have said horrible things to me, things that echo the bullies and tormentors of middle school days gone by. But my friends were also hilarious. I laughed along, often at my own expense, and I forgive them their trespasses.

Sqoot, a company promoting a coding marathon in Beantown called the Boston API Jam, came up with a doozy. In the invitation to the event, Sqoot lists some of the perks for attendees. Among these: Massages; a Live DJ; Gym Access; Top Shelf liquor; Women; free dark chocol . . . wait a minute, did they say women? Women are a perk? Yes, indeed.

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The Smell of Gaming

, Feb 15th 2012 Discuss [4]

Walking my dog the other night, a breeze wafted in over the ploughed field next to my apartment building, and a scent in the air brought me back to my elementary school cafeteria. It wasn’t the pizza. It wasn’t the milk served in sealed plastic bags. It was just a general smell. The cleaning solutions. The plastic and linoleum. The scent of a few hundred kids rushing through in a couple hours. Something on the air caught my nose, and I was instantly transported back to a time I didn’t realize I could remember. Such is the power of scent memory.

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Much Ado About Booth Babes

, Jan 24th 2012 Discuss [7]

If you look up the term “objectification of women” in your college dictionary, you’ll probably see a definition illustrated by a photograph of a tall, slender, blond woman wearing skimpy shorts and a tight t-shirt, standing next to a table stacked with plastic cell phone carrying cases. Recently, there’s been a lot of hubbub over these hired guns who stand at booths set up at the trade shows that are dominated by men. The video game shows, the technology shows, the car shows.

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The Problem With Tech and Teaching

, Jan 20th 2012 Discuss [52]

Let me tell you a funny story about technology in the classroom. I was teaching English at a charter school in Boston a few years ago, and my classes were working on “Macbeth.” I’m always looking for new angles of attack, especially with Shakespeare, so I decided to focus on different interpretations and stagings of the play. I cut scenes from a variety of movie versions of Macbeth and showed them to my classes, so we could compare the difference. I used a Royal Shakespeare company version. I used the movie “Scotland, PA,” a wonderful modern adaptation in which Macbeth’s is a fast food restaurant. But my favorite of all was the Roman Polanski version, produced with funding from Hugh Hefner.

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The Problem With Pink Gadgets: Not Enough Of Them

, Jan 8th 2012 Discuss [25]

My son’s favorite color is pink. It’s not even close. He’s three years old. Whenever he is offered anything, he wants it in pink. He’s always loved the color. His favorite lovey is pink. His favorite toy cars are pink. When we drive through at Starbucks, he always wants a cake pop, and the only one he’ll eat is the Birthday Cake flavor. It’s pink, with sprinkles. This is, of course, a problem, but not in the way you might think.

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Stop Whining and Go To Las Vegas

, Jan 6th 2012 Discuss [15]

Have you seen the video of kids complaining about their Christmas presents? I won’t go into much detail, because SlashGear’s own Chris Burns covers this succinctly. But the gist is that it’s a video of entitled kids complaining about the gifts they did not get. My favorites are the ones (plural) where kids complain “Sure, I got a car, but I also wanted an iPad.” Then they curse at their parents, or their creator, or life in general. I agree with Burnsy. Take their gifts away.

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Stop Whining and Turn Off Your Phone

, Jan 3rd 2012 Discuss [55]

I learned when I was a camp counselor that you should always support the person up front. When they say something wrong, let it slide and fix it later. When they suggest something unpopular, go with it, and if it proves unsuccessful, it’s no big deal. I never had a camp director suggest we run naked through a poison ivy patch, or show up to Hershey Park at 4AM so we can get a good parking spot. Usually, things worked out in the end.

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New Year’s Meta-Tech Resolutions

, Jan 1st 2012 Discuss [2]

It’s been a year since I issued my “Anti-Tech Resolutions,” and now it’s time for a new batch. But this won’t be the same Anti-Tech spiel that I ran last year. I learned a lot from those resolutions, both the ones I kept and decided to abandon. But I learned more about how to keep and follow a New Year’s resolution itself. So, here’s what I have learned about making New Year’s resolutions, including my newest set of technological directives for the coming year.

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Time to Upgrade My Parents

, Dec 30th 2011 Discuss [59]

Mom . . . Dad . . . we need to talk. And by “we,” I mean I’m going to talk, and you’re just going to agree with everything I say and follow my advice forevermore. And by “talk” I mean I’m going to write a public column on SlashGear, and hopefully you won’t really read it, because you’ve always taken my sardonic humor as just a little too mean. Anyway, I love you both, but it’s time to have a technology intervention. I’m going to keep this simple and easy. But if something doesn’t change, I just don’t know if I can provide the kind of technology support you need anymore.

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A Negative Correlation Between Fun and Facebook

, Dec 17th 2011 Discuss [27]

I have a friend who is not on Facebook, and never has been. One friend. Let’s call him Marley, like the puppy (don’t spoil the ending, I’m still reading). He didn’t leave Facebook. He’s never been a member. He knows about it. All of his friends are on Facebook. Marley’s wife is on Facebook, and she’s my friend there (and in real life). Marley’s brother is on Facebook, where he also promotes a band and local tour dates. But Marley flatly refuses to join.

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How Much Is A Twitter Follower Worth?

, Nov 13th 2011 Discuss [12]

A technology Web site, PhoneDog.com, and one of its former chief editors, Noah Kravitz, are embroiled in a legal battle that could have fascinating repercussions for social networks. Kravitz is suing PhoneDog over contractual issues, but it’s the counter-suit that really has my attention. PhoneDog is suing Kravitz over the use of his Twitter handle. They claim that he improperly kept the Twitter name after he left the company, and that he owes them damages of $2.50 for each Twitter follower he took with him, for each month he held them after he left. At 17,000 followers when he left, and 8 months since then, that starts damages at $370,000. So, that’s not even the full value PhoneDog puts on the Twitter account, but rather the value that Kravitz took with him when he left. PhoneDog essentially believes a key Twitter account is worth half a million dollars per year.

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